Behind every successful man, there is a woman

Behind every successful man, there is a woman, right? A smart, street-savvy and industrious one, not so? I thought that was a given. So I was shocked to hear a man alleging that behind every successful woman is a man in tears. A man who once offered a woman the world, and then was stunned when she took it and left him penniless.

Some men still believe that women cannot make it on their own. “If a woman is able to save her money, it is only because some poor man somewhere is paying her bills,” the gentleman said.

Well, for some women, that’s true and for some it isn’t. It certainly is not the case for every woman. Some women make their own money without the safety net provided by a male benefactor. They pay their own bills on their own steam.

Which is sad, because that’s not the way it was intended.

I was watching a talk show and some bigtime, American movie star was on. The kind you would imagine would be politically correct to a fault. There is a genus of Hollywood sheep, which only bleats in unison. It’s a ‘pro-everything’ type of animal, except when the herd says otherwise.

This man fit the bill to a tee. So it was surprising when he disassociated from the herd to declare his belief that women and men should stick to their gender roles. “If your man wants a sandwich, get up and make him a sandwich,” he said, to murmurs of disapproval from the studio audience.

“Women expect men to open doors, pull out chairs, protect them from unwanted advances and pay for dinner. So if daddy wants a sandwich, you better get off your butt and get daddy a sandwich!”

Well, crass as it sounds, the man might have a valid point. There are some things that men do better than women ever will and the reverse is true. They are natural protectors, for instance. Many of them are excellent problem solvers. Which woman doesn’t want to feel like her man can sort out any problem she throws at him? And yeah, when they get to providing, the good ones can do that pretty well too.

So why do we feel the need to mess with a good thing? If a man wants to do ‘manly’ things, by all means, let him. If he doesn’t, remain secure in the knowledge that if push comes to shove, you can take care of yourself.

Perhaps I’m hanging out in the ‘wrong’ crowd, but most of the men I know wouldn’t know how to make a proper sandwich if they were reading a recipe. The ones who do are more than happy to let the women in their lives do it for them. As I say, there are some things that most women do better than most men. If you expect him to beat up a man twice his size because the dude tried to grope you in a club, why wouldn’t you find it in your heart to fix him a hot plate?

Bottom line, it comes down to role management. You can switch the roles around if the feminist in you can’t stand the thought of pandering to a man, but whichever way you look at it, men and women get along much better when they complement each other. This working at cross-purposes out of some belief that helping is slaving, is not getting us anywhere.